So it occurs to me that I'm fast approaching the third trimester aka the home stretch.
And that I will be having a baby THIS year. 2012 is exciting for that reason alone. Before the new year arrived, Little Lady's arrival was something that was happening 'next year.' That seemed like a looong time away.
Suddenly, it is a mere 3.5 months from now.
In the last few weeks, a serious 'pop' has occurred, belly-wise.
It makes me a little nervous when I look at my belly and wonder just how much bigger I can get. Which is silly because I've done this twice before and thusly, know the answer to that is, "Much, much, MUCH bigger."
Pregnant belly size. Surely, this should be a sacred thing, exempt from judgement, either by ourselves or others. But it's not, is it? Nope, even during pregnancy we berate ourselves or are passive aggressively (and sometimes just aggressively) graded on the way we carry our babies.
I have been heavily pregnant three times now and can say that I have carried very similarly each time. Nausea and exhaustion have meant that I have NOT eaten particularly carefully each time. Genetically, I am lucky to carry in a way that people describe as "all baby." I typically gain around 12 kilos each time and by the pointy end of the pregnancy, my belly is pretty damned big. But then, my torso measures about 10 centrimetres from knockers to navel so where else can baby go but out?
I am comfortable with my pregnant body.
Mostly, people are flattering. But I have also had people tell me how HUGE my belly is. When I was pregnant with Ziggy, a tradesmen who had to return to my house two weeks in a row commented that I had gotten "MUCH bigger since last week!"
Hey, thanks for noticing, fuckwit!
A friend once relayed, with some pride, how most people couldn't tell she had a belly even at the end of her pregnancy.
Another woman, small of stature, was lavishly praised for her tiny tum, particularly when it was discovered that she had been carrying a 10 pound baby. Just where had she been hiding it?
I can't imagine any woman not being stoked if the same comments were made to or about her. No woman wants to be told she is anything but small, even in the final weeks of her pregnancy.
But the simple truth is, every body is different and so it follows that each body will have a unique way of carrying the baby within.
Yes, some of us over-indulge during pregnancy and put on a bit more beef than might be advisable (celebs tend to really blow out which is an excellent indicator of how they must deprive themselves normally to stay so very thin). Others will naturally carry small. I think a pregnant belly is beautiful no matter what - big and blooming or a compact little tum.
Surely, pregnancy is the one domain where the female form should have no ideal. If you're mostly eating nutritious food, managing a bit of a walk with some regularity and that little bub is growing nicely, then your belly is perfect just the way it is.
I agree, a pregnant belly is something to celebrate regardless of the size, width, girth etc. That’s life being created right there!
I think you look divine 🙂 I’m 31 weeks pregnant and had a lady say to me last week “Ohhhhh, you must be due anyday!”… “Ah no (you silly cow) I am 30 weeks, I have a way to go yet” as I smile politely. Then shes says “You sure it’s not twins in there?!” with a wink wink, nudge nudge…. I wanted to take the freshly squeezed juice she had just bought and tip it over her head!
My butt goes out in sympathy with my belly when I’m UTD… ah well, that’s me 🙂
You know though I have had friends who’ve been told their belly is small often, then start to freak out their bub’s too small. People should just say nothing other than “You are glowing” or “Lovely belly”…. or nothing!!!!!
Amen!!!!
You look so, so lovely! Feelings pangs of envy here as I remember my baby-in-belly times – there’s nothing like it in the world.
I’ve been another lucky one who carries just baby (8-9 kg both times, even with a 4.44 kg bub) but given my starting weight, it’s no miracle – just happened to have some fat reserves to start with. Also, being amazonian, there’s plenty of room in these here hips for a baby to snuggle into, without looking ‘big’.
So it was with much amusement during my last pregnancy that – despite most people being surprised at how far along I was – one particular colleague (let’s call her Dip Shit) took every opportunity to exclaim how ‘massive’ I was, with great relish. The fact that Dip Shit only ever did this when we were alone in the lift, and never within earshot of anyone else, made me decide she was no friend of the sisterhood and clearly had her own agenda.
Big, small, whatever… unless people feel they have something positive to say about another woman’s belly, they just need to shut the hell up. Pregnancy is BEAUTIFUL in all sizes.
Anyone who makes a negative comment about a pregnant woman needs a talking to. Or a smack in the chops. Actually I’m going for the latter.
Agreed TOTALLY that your outward appearance while pregnant has very little to do with (a) the size of the baby (b) what you’ve been eating (c) how much of a “good mother” you’ve been (see that shit starts early).
I’ve heard the most ignorant comments about some people’s size and most of them come from other women. It just fits with my theory that we really are our own worst enemy sometimes. We will never make real progress in this world until we stop cutting each other down.
And you look stunning by the way!
I think you look wonderful! I think pregnant women are beautiful. (I’m a photographer and expecting mothers have always been my favorite subjects.)
I think I must be the only woman who doesn’t mind being referred to as “big” when pg. Me plus big babies = HUGE. No denying it lol!
was asked by Rude Mum at playgroup how big my bubba no. 2 was when newborn. when i answered 7.25 pounds she stared and said, But … your placenta must have been HUGE! (can we all say, And you are a HUGE bitch!?!) *sigh* xt
Oh no she didn’t!!!
I would have had to slap her right in her hugely idiotic face. Some people are demented, truly they are.
I think you looked lovely pregnant. A blooming rose. xx
Thank you!
Yes, the pregnant body is beautiful.
Thanks, love.
Yep, women are the worst perpetrators of speaking unkindly about eachother. I guess we get lots of practise from that negative self-talk that’s on constant loop in most of our brains….
I remember Dip Shit. She was such a dip shit!
You do pregnancy beautifully, MJ. You really do. But so does every woman. It’s just that there are many of us who don’t/can’t embrace it. Which is a crying shame, don’t you think?
Oh yes, I’ve had the old, “You sure there’s not two in there?”
Ummm, well, let’s see. I’ve had a myriad of professionals examine/scan me since becoming pregnant and none of them have discovered an extra baby but since I’m such a wilderbeest, I guess it’s possible. Thanks for the heads up.
Nice or nothing at all, people. It’s not that hard!
Make sure you let me know when bub arrives, Mrs T!
Exactly! A miracle unfolding – big or otherwise.
Oh I hate it when people say stuff like that! I had that a lot – ‘you’ve still got that long to go? I don’t think you can get any bigger!’ Thanks heaps, people.
You look wonderful.