Last night, Aunty Tor, a Family M-G fave, stopped by for a glass (or three) of Christmas cheer. We drank pink bubbles, exchanged gifts and drank more pink bubbles and then we laughed at YouTube clips of people being completely embarrassing or completely talented. It was ace.

But it meant Random Mumma Thoughts did not happen. It’s a busy time of year and maybe you didn’t even notice. But I’m choosing to believe that you did notice, that last night just wasn’t the same without RMTT.

And then, of course, today, I needed to write a Friday Faves. Christmas Eve, huh? Yeah, I don’t have time for all this writing pressure. So here’s my ingenious plan. I’ve rolled the two into one fabulous Christmas Combo!

Firstly, a Christmassy RMTT #16

-         Yesterday, I turned the house upside down looking for a card I had written for Aunty Tor some weeks earlier. I mean, I turned the place UPSIDE DOWN. I couldn’t find it anywhere. I was so, so fucking annoyed. It had been on my writing desk, in the same spot, for WEEKS! And now, GONE! It wasn’t until I was through my first glass of pink bubbles that I started to get over my frustration.

Today, I find it. I find the card sitting on top of my computer. And I just feel very strongly that I checked there. THREE TIMES. If the card had a throat, I would definitely have punched it.

-         I have not wrapped the presents yet. And B has to put up the trampoline tonight. Relaxing Christmas Eve? Sure, why not? It’ll be fun. I love wrapping presents and B is a gun at putting things together….. We may need beer.

-         The reason I haven’t wrapped the presents which I have had sitting in my cupboard since approximately August is because….I can’t remember. But tonight seems as good a time as any. -         The reason B hasn’t put up the trampoline yet is because it’s big and I felt the kids might get suspicious about the big fucking trampoline in the back yard.

-         This Christmas, the M-Gs are celebrating with four people and four people only. That’s right. We have forsaken all others and are just doing our own little family Christmas. We love our extended families, of course we do, but holy relaxation, it’ll be nice not to have to go anywhere or see anyone.

-         Downside – I have to cook.

-         Upside – I can reserve the crunchiest roasted potatoes for myself.

-         Threatening that Santa won’t bring presents as a way of ensuring good behaviour is a dismal failure. It’s a hollow threat. I know it and my three-and-a-half-year-old sure as hell knows it. What are we going to do? Cancel Christmas? Missing out on watching the kids open the obscene amount of presents ‘Santa’ brought them would just ruin our day. But even so, we pushed the ‘No Santa’ line right up until LD’s bedtime. He was breaking new naughtiness records all day long in what can only be viewed as a big ‘FUCK YOU!’ to the fat guy but I think the Santa thing did get LD (LittleDemon) to sleep more quickly than usual.

-         Zee has been an angel and I’m tempted to give him all of LD’s presents.

-         No matter how bad my day was or how heinous my children’s behaviour has been, watching them drift into slumber just about stops my heart. It is a gift. That moment is a gift. And it never gets old.

-         I love Christmas carols. No, really, I love them. I’m listening to Sinatra sing the classics as I type.

-         I love Christmas. I really do.

-         My Christmas tree is already dead. It’s been dead for a least a week. It’s so dry the needles just crumble to dust if you touch them. What a rip.

-         I think I might buy a big fuck-off plastic tree at the Boxing Day sales.

-         What is it about Christmas and just being compelled to eat shit constantly? I am a walking box of chocolates right now.

-         And also, some chilli flavoured potato chips… 

-         The gym is closed for the next four days.

-         NOT. MY. FAULT.

And now, onto Friday Faves. And at this time of maximumly extreme consumerism, I’m not going to show you any ‘stuff’ – the last thing any of us needs is to look at more things we could possibly buy. Instead, I want to share a favourite Christmas photo.

It’s me, circa…I don’t know, maybe 1985? It makes me laugh. And it takes me right there. Our family Christmases were epic. At least, I thought so. My parents – namely, my mum – put on an awesome Christmas show. I would so love to recreate that magic for my own family.

Merry Christmas to you and yours. Be safe and if necessary, be drunk.

The Little Mumma loves you!  See you in a couple of days.