This one is breaking my balls.
And I think he senses it because every time I try to take a step back, he just takes another twenty forward until he is wrapped around me like a suffocating blanket of whiney need.
Oh, I love him. That's not in question. And no-one makes me laugh like this kid. He operates on a frequency all his own and it's entertaining to say the least.
But the irrational nature of the two-almost-three-year-old is testing me. And finding me lacking.
Part of the toilet training process we are currently neck-deep in involves the reward of a lolly. But when the kid REFUSES to use the toilet while screaming for a marshmallow, it's hard not to lose one's mind. Sure, okay, you might not need to go right now but when you do, the marshmallow will be there waiting, all pink and fluffy and hitting that sweet spot that turns your volume down for those blissful…minutes. It's a straightforward concept and we've been through it many times before.
Before I was out of bed this morning, Ziggy had knocked over a cup of chocolate milk, pissed his pants AND pissed on a hobby horse. I can't even…
And then there's the infuritating "already" reply. For example:
Zig: I want ice-cream.
Me: And you'll get ice-cream after dinner if you're a good boy.
Zig: I a good boy already.
And then;
Me: Zig, do you need to do wee on the toilet?
Zig: I do wees already.
It's hard to argue. Technically, he's right. He has absolutely already done a wee but it seems cruel to remind him that the last time he said that, he peed twelve litres onto the lounge room floor not five minutes later.
Of course, Luca was once this age. I should know what I'm doing. But Luca was never so persistent. Or so loud. This kid wears me down. Not with tantrums. No, he just prefers to cry at a decibel that will shatter you eardrums and your very last nerve.
I don't want to cave to his tiny tyranny but how do you go hard ass on a little face like his?
My daughter will be 3 in February and we attempted toilet training a few months ago and it was going no where and I was getting frustrated so we stopped. Just this week she has decided she wants to do it and it’s clicked! She’s got it, even if at the moment that means running to the toilet overtime she feels she’s going to pass gas! But overall I’ve certainly decided that toilet training cant be forced and they’ll do it when ready! Good luck
Oh my friend. I can relate. Toilet training brought out my most awful tendencies as a parent. My son just couldn’t be bothered to use the potty. I would love to tell you the magic secret that worked for us. But I honestly couldn’t tell you. I’m sure the shrieking in frustration I did wasn’t what helped!
When we sent him to preschool at 4, I was crossing my fingers that he was well and truly trained. He only had one accident after that.
Good luck!
Thanks, Neatsie. I waited until Luca was 3.5 – I read once you need to wait until they’re ready so I’m not too hung up on it. Zig has taken all the initiative himself – and that can be the hardest thing. He insists on wearing undies but then forgets he’s wearing them! But he’ll get there.
It’s more just his general vibe at the moment – clingy and argumentative. And the cry! Oh lordy, this kid is LOUD.
xxx
I’m reasonably relaxed about the toilet training but losing my mind at the daily arguments I have with this kid about EVERYTHING. A 2 year old will not be reasoned with!
It can’t last forever…..can it?
xx
When Looey was that age, ‘already’ was ‘maybe next week’. Yes. He would actually say to every question or direction given him “maybe next week”.
Jacob still, at 3.5 nearly 4 – answers to everything ‘uh, no thank you.”
How am I supposed to kick his arse for non compliance when his manners are so fucking brilliant?
I sympathise honey. J thrills me like no other but was sent here to fuck with me. of that I am certain.
So my only advice – carry on colombus, and drink wine. Always.drink.wine. xxx
PS jacob has started wetting the bed at night. FFS, I’m dones I tells ya with that shit. Dones! I will not have a return to the days of toilet training. It sucks!
We are encountering lots of 2 year old dramas in this household too, so feeling your pain. I have just recently discovered the blog of the Honest Toddler. Oh, it’s hilarious! I think it’s going to give me some much needed comic relief during these toddler years. His tweets and status updates on Facebook are cracking me up. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you all.
Oh, I so hear you, sister! Hang in there – it absolutely *has* to ease up, right? Right?! xo
This is all very familiar! Except for the toilet training. Nope. P wants no part of that, and I can’t decide if I’m annoyed or relieved.
The attitude, however, is all there. No screaming, but tantrums and meltdowns. If I tell her to do something, and she deems it worthy enough, then her reply will be (beginning with a heavy exhale), “Okay then. Fine. FINE, Mum, FINE.” Shit, where does a kid her age even learnt that attitude?
Oh, and her word for refusal is also “No thanks, Mum.” As in:
“P, you need to pick up that mess you’ve made.”
(insert sing-song voice) “No thanks, Mum!”
Everything is a battle. Everything. Her tantrums were daily before the summer holidays started but for some reason, having her big sister around for a few months, that behaviour disappeared… now school is back, big sister is gone each day, and her tantrums are back.
I’m a little bit over it, myself. Some people have said to me what a fun age this is. I ask, on what planet?
Ted is four. Just as ball-breaking. I think they say it ends at about 5. Hang in there my friend. I have no advice but much solidarity.
*Sigh* so nice to hear of others battling the two-year-old irrationality.
Kate’s response is ‘no no no no no – i dont want.’ said very calmly as if it’s the last word on the matter! and she just keeps repeating it no matter what is said.
Angie, I took a few days because I wanted to think more about how I responded. I’m sorry to say I’m in no better position now to offer you any kind of wisdom. =)
Is it a second child thing do you think? The toilet training saga is one that is very familiar to me. Ours took some months to complete after being fairly effortless first time around. Really gave me pause for thought and proved that there is so much more to readiness than just being able to verbalise it.
R is very full on, emotionally. This means I get a whole lotta lovin’ but I get a whole lotta aggro too and it is often at very inconvenient times. Like at 6.00 in the morning when I’m trying to get him dressed and out the door to catch a bus.
He is quite different from W and teaches me something new every day. It sounds like Zig is very like that for you too.
It will all work out in the end. Before you realise it, you will be popping his backpack on and chuffing him out the door to school. Everything seems to go so much faster with subsequent babies!